"I didn't transcend my ego, we became partners... we became teammates." - East Forest
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My bookclub friends and I just finished and discussed chapter 2 of The Untethered Soul by Michael Singer. "The Inner Roommate" expands on what we learned in chapter 1 "The voice inside your head".
Your inner roommate is your voice inside your head. Wait there's two of me?
Below are some notes from the chapter, as well as a journal prompt for further exploration.
Chapter 2: Your Inner Roommate
Inner growth is the realization that peace and contentment only comes when you stop thinking about yourself. Because “the thinking voice” (the inner roommate/ego) you misidentify as yourself… will never be at peace or content… it always has a problem. It’s the ego’s job to have a problem.
To be “free of problems” stop identifying with the ego who always has problems. You can always ask… what part of me has a problem? What part of me is jealous? And you'll always find that the ego has the problem, not the soul. The soul is just love and connected to errythang.
Identifying with soul = spiritually minded person… identifying with ego = worldly minded person. “Worldly doesn't mean that you have money or stature. Worldly means that you think the solution to your inner problems is in the world outside. You think that if you change things outside you'll be okay” but you're never okay by changing what’s outside because theres always a new problem.
Freedom is gained by first stepping back into the soul/witness. You can't solve a problem within the energy of the problem. “The first problem you have to deal with is your own reaction” Realize that the problem is actually how it causes you to feel on the inside, not what’s objectively happening. “This involves a change from “outer solution consciousness to inner solution consciousness” break the habit of thinking the solution is to rearrange things outside." The only permanent solution is to let go of the ego who always has a problem, once you do that, you are clear to deal with whatever’s left to deal with.
You can call the ego your "inner roommate" in order to unidentify yourself from it… as Christopher Wallis of Tantra Illuminated says… this is the person who’s a little too close to you at the party.
The roommate is ALWAYS commenting on EVERYTHING. He won't be quiet, he always has an opinion, a preference, an analysis, a judgment. It's very unsettling.
There’s effectively 2 people inside of you. The first is you, the awareness, the witness, the center of your willful intentions, and the other is that which you watch. You've been locked in here with a maniac. Ex: anything you're doing your roommate could decide “i don't wanna be here i hate this i don't want to do this, i don't like this person” and immediately you feel tense and uncomfortable. Your roommate can ruin anything in a moment’s notice… and often does.
The first step is to just watch. Watch how he never shuts up. Watch how neurotic and annoying he is. To be free of him, you first gotta get wise and honest about the severity of your predicament. Become SO aware of your mess of a roommate. If you want your inner world to be a peaceful home, you've got to fix it. To do so, personify your roommate as if he was someone outside of your body… give him his own body and become so horrified by him. And then make him your best friend. "I didn't transcend my ego, we became partners... we became teammates." - East Forest
How would you feel if someone outside really started talking to you the way your inner voice does?... you wouldn't last a day… and you go to this “person” for advice, but they are constantly changing their mind and going back and forth of where they stand… are they even credible?
You've only really had one problem your entire life… this roommate. To settle him down, you first need to REALLY decide that you want to change your relationship with him. What's the answer? Yoga. the knowledge that frees you. “Once you've made this freedom the meaning of your life, there are spiritual practices that can help you. These practices are what you do with your time in order to free yourself from yourself."
Distance yourself from your psyche… SEE the direction of your life when you're clear, and stick to that! Don't let the wavering mind (the roommate) distract you. Your will is stronger than listening to that voice. Without listening to that voice, you can do anything.
TAKE BACK YOUR LIFE. reclaim it. Your roommate has been controlling you. You need your roommate (your ego) in order to operate in this material world, in this human incarnation. As Ram Dass says, the ego is necessary hardware. If we learn to take a step back and fully accept and notice how out of control our ego is, from that place of honesty, we can begin the process of healing the relationship... so that is beneficial to both parties. The soul is always content, but the ego needs to do things and solve problems. There is balance possible. That's the whole journey. That's the whole game.
Journal Prompt:
Set a timer for 5 minutes, sit down somewhere quiet and close your eyes. Begin to notice the dialogue that is happening in your head. Label that as your roommate. Give him/her a body and imagine your roommate now as someone sitting across from you, still talking, and labeling and analyzing everything. You don't need to change him, you don't need to do anything just watch how he talks.
Now set a timer again for another 5 minutes. Your roommate still sitting across from you talking. Recognize that he will always be with you, and that he actually wants the best for you... he's trying his best to take care of this human body, mind, and life path... and right now he's just ineffective. Send him love and compassion and understanding. As if you (the one who is watching) is the mother and your roommate (also still you) is the child. Give him space and notice how he actually just wants love and support and confirmation. And give that to him. Notice now, just like a triggered abused animal, with love and patience, he begins to quiet down and live in greater harmony with you. Write about your experience.
next week: chapter 3, who are you?
dream extreme!
♡ kat
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