~ beautiful, alluring, superficial or shallow ~
The starfish is a natural and exquisite beauty, mesmerizing to all. Being around someone with starfish energy is a thrill, like you've been put under a spell of divinity itself. The problem is, these creatures have been reliant on how they look (and what other people think of them) for so long that they may have forgotten their deeper callings. When this card appears it's important to ask: Am I being swayed by outward appearances? What dreams have I put aside to please others?
when in balance ~ uplifting, artistic, expressive
when out of balance ~ gossips, feels empty
to bring into balance ~ positive friends
Hello friends! :) Welcome to week 17 of our yoga series - an exploration of our lives based on the symbolism of the animal kingdom. Each creature represents a different aspect of our human journey, helping us to better understand and connect to our inner and outer worlds. Every 5 weeks in our yoga classes, we cycle through each of the 5 elements (earth, water, fire, air, space) and their respective animals in this card deck.
Last week, the rabbit of the earth element helped us to unravel our relationship with fear. Notice how you speak and think your fears into existence. The things you are scared of become the constraints of your reality. As you travel down your life path, you realize that some of the fears that once protected you, now imprison you. We learned to recognize that often, our only fear is of the feeling of fear itself. If we can begin to shift our relationship with fear to one of love... our fear becomes an incredible guide, rather than something to run from.
This week, we return to the water element, which relates to our emotions, feelings, creativity, and inspiration. Our teacher for this week is the starfish. She asks us to take an honest look at how we have neglected deep parts of ourselves because we are so consumed with how others see us.
Your first impression of another person, is most often their appearance - what they look like. Or maybe what they are doing when you first see them. This is how we make that initial judgement - am I drawn to this person or not?
This just seems to be how we are currently operating. But it's not the whole story. There's something else going on when you feel drawn to another person... you could call this a "vibe"... their vibe, their essence, their spirit. There's something unseen that's also pulling you.
When you truly enjoy spending time with someone, it's not because of how they look or what they do, or how they read on paper... you want to be around them because you feel connected to them - your energy just clicks. And you notice these connections to varying degrees of intensity, depending on the person, on the stage of your life, etc.
In the age of social media, it's a bit more difficult to get a true read on this more subtle quality. A human spirit is reduced to a two-dimensional package. "This person looks like this and does these activities with these people and lives here and blah blah blah" It's not the whole story. And we know this, but this superficial image of ourselves that we put out does have an effect on our identity... and our relationship to ourselves and others.
Anyways, I say all this to point to - no one REALLY cares what you look like. No one REALLY cares what you're doing... as long as you're not hurting anyone. So why are we SO hung up on what other people think of us?
I like to think that I don't care about how other people see me, but if I'm going to be honest, that is a big fat lie. I mean, I've definitely come a long way, and as a principle, I don't care what others think (it's none of my business), but there are deep patterns that have been carved into my psyche that are still very much worried about how I appear to other people.
Why? Because I want to be liked, I want to be accepted, I want to be loved. But people don't love me because of what I look like... people don't love me because of how I spend my time. My appearance and my interests will change. Others love me because of what does not change - who I am beneath all of that decoration. And that's what I love in others, too.
And so as I begin to shed and not concern myself with all of that decor, all of that worry, that changeless spirit within me will shine even brighter. And that's what makes any particular human so radiant and attractive - the amount of light of their soul that they allow to shine through. When it comes to others, the more light that pours from them, the more attracted I am to them. Even if that means that by opening, they have to show me all their "ugliness" - it's beautiful to me. The more truth, the more wholeness, the more beautiful.
As I grow, instead of putting more on, I'm trying to take more off. And yes, I do care about how I look, and I do care about what I'm doing: my appearance. But ideally, I only care about these things to the extent that they allow more light to shine through. Because yeah, with more light, others will probably like me more sure... and that's great, I love other people. But also, with more light, I am able to love myself more, because there isn't so much "trying to prove" and "feeling not good enough" and comparison and just unnecessary fluff in the way. I get to experience myself raw and wild - all colors, not just the ones I think I "should" display. Not just the ones that I think other people will like.
In this true and real and radiant state, I am open to listen to my deeper callings, to my dreams, and to my purpose. I am not distracted and energetically drained by constantly trying to "be a certain way." I allow myself to show up in the moment in whatever way I am. I love that. I am that.
And if in the process of taking off these layers, people leave me, that's okay. Why would I want someone in my life who only likes a shell of me? Who only wants to be around a contrived shitty kind of soup of (MY personality and MY appearance and MY accomplishments) that I've fearfully thrown together, "This is me! Kat soup! Eat up! Hope you like!"
So if I'm walking around all day trying to make everyone the perfect soup, that EVERYONE will like, that is going to get SO exhausting. It does get so exhausting. So what if I just make a soup that I like... and if other people want some - awesome! We can share it together.
Okay, now we're talking about soup, I'm gonna wrap this up. I can only really speak from my own experience here, as with all of these posts, but I always hope that this can be relatable or helpful in some way for you. Our appearance is an awesome thing. It makes us all so unique! But because appearance is also so powerful, it's easy to rely heavily on it. For example, relying too much on your beautiful face, or your bangin bod, or your prominent job position, or how much your big brain knows, or your fat bank account, your shiny car, your swaggy fashion, your sick skateboard tricks. Even if your appearance is going GREAT... is there something deeper that feels missing? That you might be neglecting?
As with everything: balance. These animals are messages to bring us into balance. The most beautiful, attractive, and impressive thing you can do is be authentically and uniquely you. I KNOW that sounds cheesy but it's true. Listen, and take the steps you KNOW you need to take to journey closer to that evolved true self... and maybe your appearance changes in that process.
Next week, the lizard of the fire element has a magical sixth sense. This intuition allows the lizard to peer into the subtle intuitions of life - the unseen the unheard. However, lots of stimulation can begin to drain the lizard of her vitality and her magic.
dream extreme!
♡ kat
Comments