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to die once more




remember.


all falls away

just as quickly as it arises


in this life

all i create

i must know

and i must accept

with grace and surrender

that it will also be destroyed


all i build

will crumble


this transience

is not life’s cruelty

but her reminder of the natural cycle of what is


nothing has ever been permanent

our own fragile lives are not ours to own

but to experience a taste of this existence

with as much sincerity and depth as we can

learning to navigate the labyrinth of the mind


until we realize that all walls are illusory

and we are left in infinite expanse

complete freedom

complete uncertainty


nothing to hold

simultaneously liberating and terrifying


cognition grasping at the wind

seeking shelter

swallowed by panic

squirming in unfamiliarity


and yet…

be still

and know

that here the heart is at peace


death is here now.

birth is here now.

and what lies between

is the dance


with no agenda

no purpose

just here.


the cosmic dance

creation.

sustenance.

and dissolution.


and because it ultimately does not matter

what we do with this human life

no one really cares

only you do


we should make it pleasant

honestly and authentically pleasant

with a constant stride toward truth

with an open heart

and with service


all of this

not to reach outside

or to reach inside

but to find the collapse

and rest there

for eternity


but an active rest

not a lack of activity

but living a life is that is no longer a struggle


and you realize

maybe it never was


irrespective of conditions

you are at peace


i am at peace.


and where is peace?

here.

now.

not anything outside of here and now.


peace is in presence.

in acceptance.

surrender

enthusiasm.

and love.


for we know not what the very next second may hold

so how can i be fully here for this one?


..


im coming home.


i love you.

im all yours,


- kat


monday march 16 2020

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